BEST FUNNY QUOTES AND SAYINGS – funny inspirational quotes :: Get the best collection of funny quotes on http://popularquotes.online/funny
1 – If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me !!
2 – Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up !!
3 – A good speech should be like a woman’s skirt: long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest !!
4 – If you’re too open-minded; your brains will fall out !!
5 – Everything you do is based on the choices you make !!
6 – Either you run the day, or the day runs you !!
7 – Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak !!
8 – The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese !!
9 – The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket !!
10 – I’ve been waiting hours and I’ll be waiting for hours more, till my love arrives and my heart’s fulfilled !!
11 – A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject !!
12 – When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber !!
13 – When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone !!
14 – A lawyer is a person who writes a 100,000-word document and calls it a “brief.” !!
15 – When fate hands us a lemon, let’s try to make lemonade !!
16 – Life only delivers to people that create their own postal code. !!
17 – What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say !!
18 – You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams !!
19 – Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company !!
20 – Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer !!